MCKENNA’S GAMBLE
David Howe speaks to new fantasy novelist Juliet E. McKenna.
Juliet E McKenna’s first novel The Thief’s Gamble was published to great acclaim last year, with a follow-up now available called The Swordsman’s Oath, but the path to getting published was not easy. ‘I always wanted to write,’ explains Juliet. ‘I’ve always made up stories, even written some of them down and certainly felt that earning a living as a writer would be wonderful – but that it was a rather impractical ambition, a bit like my four-year-old wanting to be a train driver on the strength of Thomas the Tank Engine stories at bed time. The Thief’s Gamble came about when I began to take the whole business and technique of writing seriously. Writing offered me mental stimulation unrelated to motherhood and childcare, the possibility of making some contribution to the family finances and flexible work that could be fitted round kids, playgroup, school, whatever. So I wrote The Thief’s Gamble (which was not nearly as simple as it sounds) and sent it out to numerous agents. None offered to take it on but the rejections were positive and that encouraged me to keep on: sending it to publishers direct, ringing up, finding who to send it to, pitching it as professionally as I could in my covering letter.
‘Orbit, who eventually published it, got the manuscript via a different route. I had worked in my local Ottakar’s book shop between children but was at home full time after our second son was born. I gave a friend who works at Ottakar’s an early draft, knowing I could rely on her to tell me if she thought I was wasting my time (every author needs friends like these). She liked it enough, both as a reader and as a bookseller to pass it on to one of Orbit’s reps; he felt it had sufficient potential to pass it on to the commissioning editor, and he saw a story worth his while publishing. Nothing would have happened if each individual hadn’t seen something worth recommending; friendship is one thing, business is quite another!’
I wondered why Juliet had chosen to write in the fantasy genre rather than any other. ‘Because I enjoy it, I always have done,’ she smiles. ‘There’s a freedom in the genre that continues to appeal to me. So much modern literature is inward looking and self absorbed; the best fantasy has always looked outwards, offering new ideas and questions. I also felt fantasy was something I could write using my own background in history and the books I had to hand. As long as I kept the internal logic consistent, no one could contradict me or tell me I’d got it wrong, unlike for example a crime or historical novel.’
The Thief’s Gamble is fundamentally about ordinary people getting caught up in extraordinary events. ‘Whenever you come across a really enthralling story, be it fantasy or any other genre, there’s always part of you that wonders how you would react in similar situations, how you would cope. But you generally find a gap you just can’t cross, however much you empathise with a character, because so often they’ve got the magical power or the talent to talk to dragons or the forethought to have the right parents that gives them the answers they need. I wanted to see how someone without those extraordinary advantages would cope.
‘So I created Livak, a female protagonist in sharp contrast to so many fantasy heroes. She was built from some elements of myself and my closest female friends, some key aspects of other characters I had come across that suited my purposes for her and then coloured further by the demands of the plot. All my characters are based on real people, in so far as I use friends, family and people I read or hear about as a constant reality check, to keep behaviour believable. Most include aspects of people I know but no single character is drawn from any one individual; I think that would be a very quick way to lose most of your friends as well as rather stifling the imagination. The key is to be discreet and to use what you see and hear to create something original, so you don’t end up with everyone watching what they say around you, in case you later use it against them!’
Juliet is already at work on the third volume in her ongoing story. ‘Let’s just say that in The Gambler’s Fortunes, which I’m writing at the moment, Livak is looking to turn her new-found links with wizards and noblemen to practical advantage, preferably the round, gold and silver kind.
‘I enjoy exploring the fundamental challenge of realism within fantasy. I’m trying to present a socially and historically plausible world where a lot of other things are going on besides the concerns of wizards and heroes, where whatever those wizards and heroes decide to do has consequences for a lot of people. I want to explore the impact of magical and outlandish events on people who have lives of their own, whose families, friends and lovers are at least as important to them as whatever arcane quest might be dragging them away. What I want to achieve above all else are compelling stories that people really enjoy reading.’
The Thief’s Gamble and The Swordsman’s Oath are published as Orbit paperbacks, £6.99 each.
David J Howe
1999
Saturday, 20 April 2013
The Marriage of Sticks
THE MARRIAGE OF STICKS
Popular novelist Jonathan Carroll on life, love and his latest novel. By David Howe
Jonathan Carroll’s work is not easy to define. His novels fall somewhere between genre fiction and mainstream works and all are full of evocative ideas and lyrical prose. He is quick, however, to shrug off the suggestion that they might be ‘magic realism’.
‘I do know that my books are not nothing,’ he comments cryptically. ‘I write the kind of books I like to read. I say that unvainly – I’d like to pick up one of these books and go: wow, that’s good. I love books where I never know what’s coming or what to expect.
‘I can begin writing a book when I have a title or the first sentence. And I mean that literally. I have no idea where they’re going, no idea what will happen. The next book, for example, a line came to me one day: “Never buy yellow clothes or cheap leather”. It just clicked and I knew I could start writing.’
The Marriage of Sticks (Gollancz h/b), Jonathan’s latest novel, is nominally the tale of a woman who falls in love with a married man. During the course of the story, however, we discover that the woman is not at all what we might expect.
‘I initially wanted to write about a woman who gave birth to herself,’ reveals Jonathan, ‘which was a really compelling idea. She has this child and somehow she knows that it’s herself. She’s going to have to raise herself. What would she do?
‘So I started writing in that direction and suddenly hit a block. I couldn’t get any further. So I put it down and didn’t write anything for a long time as I was over in Hollywood working on some film projects, and then I wrote Kissing The Beehive and when I finished that book, I suddenly realised that my woman from The Marriage of Sticks was a vampire. It’s not that she was giving birth to herself at all, but that was okay as the new idea took me in a direction that seemed to work.
‘This whole vampire idea came to me when I wrote a vampire story for a collection, and in the introduction to my story I wrote that the biggest vampire of all was life. It sucks everything out of us and then spits us out at the end, dead. That started my mind working around the question: what is vampirism? It’s simple things like blood, yes, but you go to the transcendental level and it’s energy: spiritual and physical. This sort of vampirism is all around us all the time. We use, we abuse people. We manipulate others for our own purposes. At the end of a bad love affair, for example, your soul is empty, drained. This was the idea I needed for The Marriage of Sticks.’
The title, while strange, fits the book well, and the event to which it refers was drawn from real life. ‘I was walking with my beloved dog by the Danube one day, and was just very happy. No reason, just happy. And I bent down and picked up a stick – I don’t know why – and put it in my pocket and went home. There, I took a magic marker and wrote “Happy by the Danube” on the stick, together with the date. After that, now and then, I would pick up another stick … there’s a little pile of sticks in my house, all celebrating good and happy moments.
‘When I look at the sticks together, I see my life, it’s all there. I think that one day, when I’m old or unfortunately ill, I’ll burn them. What a wonderful smell that would be.’
There are many themes to Jonathan’s work, but to the fore is an exploration of life itself. How events change people, and how people can change each other. His characters move through a familiar world, but one which can be turned on its head with no warning. ‘But isn’t that true on a lesser level with all our lives?’ asks Jonathan. ‘Don’t we all experience that? And it just so happens that in many cases it’s more mundane, but we all ask: “how did I get here?”
‘That idea intrigues me … how do we get from A to B? In my next book, I have a character who meets themselves aged 17. What would your 17-year-old self think of you now? Would they be impressed or disappointed? Would they be embarrassed? I think of my 17-year-old self as a gangster, a real tough guy and all those things, and I’m sitting here in a suit, writing books, living in Europe … Would he think I was cool or would he think I was a dope? … that’s interesting, and I’m trying to answer the question in the book. A lot of writing is trying to answer your own questions. It’s just that sometimes it takes a couple of hundred pages to find the answer.’
With thanks to Christian Lewis and Karen Mahoney.
David J Howe
1999
Popular novelist Jonathan Carroll on life, love and his latest novel. By David Howe
Jonathan Carroll’s work is not easy to define. His novels fall somewhere between genre fiction and mainstream works and all are full of evocative ideas and lyrical prose. He is quick, however, to shrug off the suggestion that they might be ‘magic realism’.
‘I do know that my books are not nothing,’ he comments cryptically. ‘I write the kind of books I like to read. I say that unvainly – I’d like to pick up one of these books and go: wow, that’s good. I love books where I never know what’s coming or what to expect.
‘I can begin writing a book when I have a title or the first sentence. And I mean that literally. I have no idea where they’re going, no idea what will happen. The next book, for example, a line came to me one day: “Never buy yellow clothes or cheap leather”. It just clicked and I knew I could start writing.’
The Marriage of Sticks (Gollancz h/b), Jonathan’s latest novel, is nominally the tale of a woman who falls in love with a married man. During the course of the story, however, we discover that the woman is not at all what we might expect.
‘I initially wanted to write about a woman who gave birth to herself,’ reveals Jonathan, ‘which was a really compelling idea. She has this child and somehow she knows that it’s herself. She’s going to have to raise herself. What would she do?
‘So I started writing in that direction and suddenly hit a block. I couldn’t get any further. So I put it down and didn’t write anything for a long time as I was over in Hollywood working on some film projects, and then I wrote Kissing The Beehive and when I finished that book, I suddenly realised that my woman from The Marriage of Sticks was a vampire. It’s not that she was giving birth to herself at all, but that was okay as the new idea took me in a direction that seemed to work.
‘This whole vampire idea came to me when I wrote a vampire story for a collection, and in the introduction to my story I wrote that the biggest vampire of all was life. It sucks everything out of us and then spits us out at the end, dead. That started my mind working around the question: what is vampirism? It’s simple things like blood, yes, but you go to the transcendental level and it’s energy: spiritual and physical. This sort of vampirism is all around us all the time. We use, we abuse people. We manipulate others for our own purposes. At the end of a bad love affair, for example, your soul is empty, drained. This was the idea I needed for The Marriage of Sticks.’
The title, while strange, fits the book well, and the event to which it refers was drawn from real life. ‘I was walking with my beloved dog by the Danube one day, and was just very happy. No reason, just happy. And I bent down and picked up a stick – I don’t know why – and put it in my pocket and went home. There, I took a magic marker and wrote “Happy by the Danube” on the stick, together with the date. After that, now and then, I would pick up another stick … there’s a little pile of sticks in my house, all celebrating good and happy moments.
‘When I look at the sticks together, I see my life, it’s all there. I think that one day, when I’m old or unfortunately ill, I’ll burn them. What a wonderful smell that would be.’
There are many themes to Jonathan’s work, but to the fore is an exploration of life itself. How events change people, and how people can change each other. His characters move through a familiar world, but one which can be turned on its head with no warning. ‘But isn’t that true on a lesser level with all our lives?’ asks Jonathan. ‘Don’t we all experience that? And it just so happens that in many cases it’s more mundane, but we all ask: “how did I get here?”
‘That idea intrigues me … how do we get from A to B? In my next book, I have a character who meets themselves aged 17. What would your 17-year-old self think of you now? Would they be impressed or disappointed? Would they be embarrassed? I think of my 17-year-old self as a gangster, a real tough guy and all those things, and I’m sitting here in a suit, writing books, living in Europe … Would he think I was cool or would he think I was a dope? … that’s interesting, and I’m trying to answer the question in the book. A lot of writing is trying to answer your own questions. It’s just that sometimes it takes a couple of hundred pages to find the answer.’
With thanks to Christian Lewis and Karen Mahoney.
David J Howe
1999
The Invasion
THE INVASION
The Date: 1968.
The Place: Living room of 25 Woodside Close, Tolworth, Surrey, England.
The Time: Around 17:40pm
A small 7-year-old boy is sitting transfixed on the sofa as Jamie, Zoe and their new friend Isobel, descend through a manhole into a dark and dingy sewer below. The group clusters together, looking from side to side. The young boy gets up off the sofa and, without taking his eyes off the screen, backs to the door and leaves the room.
As the trio hear a noise coming down the sewer towards them, the boy is now watching wide-eyed through the crack in the door. Suddenly, the terrifying silver shape of a Cyberman lurches out of the darkness making an horrific electronic howling noise and the boy’s eyes open wider in shock. With a sigh of relief the image of the Cyberman fades and is replaced with the familiar names of those who ‘you had been watching’ and the boy, mind etched forever with this image, returns to the room. What would happen next? Would Jamie, Zoe and Isobel escape … how would they escape. Only seven days to find the answer.
I’m sure you won’t be amazed to discover that the small boy was myself, aged 7, and the scene described is one of my cherished memories of watching sixties Doctor Who live and as it happened. And I really did watch the show through the crack in the door and not, as some would suggest, from behind the sofa. For the sofa was pushed back against the wall, and … things … lurked back there in the darkness. To watch from behind the sofa meant the possibility of a silver hand suddenly clamping down on your leg and dragging you back to a grisly fate, or just maybe the stray threads that hung there were not cotton at all, but fronds of stinging seaweed …
This 1968 Patrick Troughton story stayed with me throughout the early seventies. The first ever Doctor Who reference book, The Making of Doctor Who, published in 1972 by Pan Books, proved to me that these stray memories I had of watching the show were not simply figments of my own imagination. They were real. They had actually happened. This was reinforced by the Radio Times tenth anniversary special in 1973 and, in that magazine, I found a title for this piece of unforgotten sixties television: 'The Invasion'.
Fast forward to 1976, when I discovered the existence of the Doctor Who Appreciation Society. I joined up in November of that year, and one of the first things I found was that their Reference Department, then being run by Jeremy Bentham, had available detailed information about a selected few Doctor Who adventures, and among them was 'The Invasion'.
Imagine as a somewhat Cyber-obsessed fifteen-year-old sent off his postal order for however much these things cost and then settled back to wait.
A scant two days later, the postman delivered a somewhat crumpled, rolled up set of A4 sheets. I carefully slit the sellotape holding it together and there it was … an incredibly detailed synopsis of all eight episodes of this story. Wow. Oh wow.
Words cannot express how excited I was to read the details of this story. An adventure in space and time that I only half remembered seeing. A brief snatch of my past relived before my eyes. I was hooked. Not only did the reference Department have 'The Invasion', but they had details of many other stories too and, as often as funds allowed, I would send off for them and marvel at this incredible history that Doctor Who had, a history that I had only just glimpsed before through the earlier reference works.
As a side note, this moment of revelation of Doctor Who’s history is one which I envy any young fans coming to the programme today. It is something that so many of us take totally for granted, and yet for me it was, I think, the defining moment between my not being a fan, and my becoming committed to the show for life. The message is, don’t take this for granted. Don’t be superior to younger fans, and allow them their moment of discovery that Doctor Who is far more than just a single Doctor, or a single story …
Having discovered the Reference Department, it was not long before I struck up correspondence with Jeremy Bentham. He was kind enough to tolerate questions and suggestions, and when we finally met (and I can’t remember the circumstances) he was a nice bloke as well. Before long I was contributing to the range. I seem to recall 'The Talons of Weng Chiang' as being one of my earliest Story Information (STINFOs as they were called) publications, but I also did ones for 'The Invasion Of Time', 'The Sunmakers', 'Image Of The Fendahl' and 'The Robots Of Death'.
As a result of this involvement, I got to know the other people then involved in the running of the Society, notably Jan Vincent-Rudzki, who was the president. Again, I cannot remember the details, but I became aware that there were audio tapes of some of the early Doctor Who adventures in existence. I had been recording it myself since 'Robot', but I was surprised for some reason that others might have had the same idea as me, but much sooner.
Once I learned that they existed, I plucked up courage and asked Jan if he might consider doing me some copies. Thankfully he was a generous soul and agreed. And can you guess what the first story I requested was? Indeed. 'The Invasion'.
Picture the scene. I would set up my dad’s cassette decks in the back room of our house – luckily my dad had a pretty decent hi-fi set up, which was why I had been able to record Doctor Who directly from a TV tuner rather than via a microphone since the time I started recording it. I would then slip on a pair of headphones and settle back in the armchair, press ‘play’ and close my eyes. With a whoosh the TARDIS reformed in space and the Doctor, Jamie and Zoe were wondering where they were … it was the dark side of the moon, and someone had fired a missile at them!
What an experience that was. To actually listen to this particular Doctor Who story after all those years. But what really got to me was the music. That haunting Don Harper score transported me like nothing has before or since. Even today I cannot hear that music without being plunged into a reverie of goosebump-raising pleasure, full of images of the second Doctor, Jamie, Zoe and the Cybermen. I find it hard to believe that just four minutes of music – for that is all there is, it’s just repeated a lot – can have such a profound effect on a person.
I loved 'The Invasion'. Loved it with a passion. When I eventually managed to get my hands on a video copy of it some years later, my love affair with this single sixties adventure continued unabated. To actually watch it was, at the time, still a great novelty – something else which fans today forget. Not everyone used to simply be able to go to their cupboard and have the choice of numerous Doctor Who adventures before them. I can remember being pleased and surprised that Benton was there at the start of episode two, I was staggered as to how good Kevin Stoney was on screen – I already knew him from the audio, but being able to see the visuals was simply mind-blowing.
When I got to the scenes in the sewers … whoa … severe sixties flashback time. There was my memory, as I remembered it, there, in front of me, on the television screen … I can’t explain but it’s like a rush of adrenaline, a powering through of nostalgia and love and pleasure and awe all mixed together.
When I started my own series of detailed synopses for the DWAS’ reference Department, we started with season 7, but when we came to season 6 (there was no rhyme nor reason for the order, just what we felt like doing) I of course wrote the synopsis for 'The Invasion' myself. Something that I was particularly, and obscurely, proud of, was that I tried really hard with the pieces for episodes 1 and 4 which did not exist on video. As a result, in certain green-eyed quarters there were claims that I had somehow hoarded those episodes on video as there was no way that I could have got all that detail without having seen the episodes recently. I beg to differ. I did not even remember watching those episodes in the sixties, but with Jeremy’s original synopsis to guide my way, and having listened to the tapes on numerous occasions, I could hear the story, while my imagination supplied the visuals. I just wrote them down as best I could, while not trying to do anything that might be disproved in the future.
Today I still love 'The Invasion'. It is a classic sixties Doctor Who adventure in many respects, and the commercial video release brought it to the attention of many fans world-wide. However, for me it is still the audio that I love with a passion. I really enjoy listening to Doctor Who on audio, even stories which exist on video in their entirety, and 'The Invasion' is one of my favourites. I only have to hear the bars of Harper’s music to be transported again …
Excuse me … I have to go now. There’s an audio tape demanding to be played.
David J Howe
1998
The Date: 1968.
The Place: Living room of 25 Woodside Close, Tolworth, Surrey, England.
The Time: Around 17:40pm
A small 7-year-old boy is sitting transfixed on the sofa as Jamie, Zoe and their new friend Isobel, descend through a manhole into a dark and dingy sewer below. The group clusters together, looking from side to side. The young boy gets up off the sofa and, without taking his eyes off the screen, backs to the door and leaves the room.
As the trio hear a noise coming down the sewer towards them, the boy is now watching wide-eyed through the crack in the door. Suddenly, the terrifying silver shape of a Cyberman lurches out of the darkness making an horrific electronic howling noise and the boy’s eyes open wider in shock. With a sigh of relief the image of the Cyberman fades and is replaced with the familiar names of those who ‘you had been watching’ and the boy, mind etched forever with this image, returns to the room. What would happen next? Would Jamie, Zoe and Isobel escape … how would they escape. Only seven days to find the answer.
I’m sure you won’t be amazed to discover that the small boy was myself, aged 7, and the scene described is one of my cherished memories of watching sixties Doctor Who live and as it happened. And I really did watch the show through the crack in the door and not, as some would suggest, from behind the sofa. For the sofa was pushed back against the wall, and … things … lurked back there in the darkness. To watch from behind the sofa meant the possibility of a silver hand suddenly clamping down on your leg and dragging you back to a grisly fate, or just maybe the stray threads that hung there were not cotton at all, but fronds of stinging seaweed …
This 1968 Patrick Troughton story stayed with me throughout the early seventies. The first ever Doctor Who reference book, The Making of Doctor Who, published in 1972 by Pan Books, proved to me that these stray memories I had of watching the show were not simply figments of my own imagination. They were real. They had actually happened. This was reinforced by the Radio Times tenth anniversary special in 1973 and, in that magazine, I found a title for this piece of unforgotten sixties television: 'The Invasion'.
Fast forward to 1976, when I discovered the existence of the Doctor Who Appreciation Society. I joined up in November of that year, and one of the first things I found was that their Reference Department, then being run by Jeremy Bentham, had available detailed information about a selected few Doctor Who adventures, and among them was 'The Invasion'.
Imagine as a somewhat Cyber-obsessed fifteen-year-old sent off his postal order for however much these things cost and then settled back to wait.
A scant two days later, the postman delivered a somewhat crumpled, rolled up set of A4 sheets. I carefully slit the sellotape holding it together and there it was … an incredibly detailed synopsis of all eight episodes of this story. Wow. Oh wow.
Words cannot express how excited I was to read the details of this story. An adventure in space and time that I only half remembered seeing. A brief snatch of my past relived before my eyes. I was hooked. Not only did the reference Department have 'The Invasion', but they had details of many other stories too and, as often as funds allowed, I would send off for them and marvel at this incredible history that Doctor Who had, a history that I had only just glimpsed before through the earlier reference works.
As a side note, this moment of revelation of Doctor Who’s history is one which I envy any young fans coming to the programme today. It is something that so many of us take totally for granted, and yet for me it was, I think, the defining moment between my not being a fan, and my becoming committed to the show for life. The message is, don’t take this for granted. Don’t be superior to younger fans, and allow them their moment of discovery that Doctor Who is far more than just a single Doctor, or a single story …
Having discovered the Reference Department, it was not long before I struck up correspondence with Jeremy Bentham. He was kind enough to tolerate questions and suggestions, and when we finally met (and I can’t remember the circumstances) he was a nice bloke as well. Before long I was contributing to the range. I seem to recall 'The Talons of Weng Chiang' as being one of my earliest Story Information (STINFOs as they were called) publications, but I also did ones for 'The Invasion Of Time', 'The Sunmakers', 'Image Of The Fendahl' and 'The Robots Of Death'.
As a result of this involvement, I got to know the other people then involved in the running of the Society, notably Jan Vincent-Rudzki, who was the president. Again, I cannot remember the details, but I became aware that there were audio tapes of some of the early Doctor Who adventures in existence. I had been recording it myself since 'Robot', but I was surprised for some reason that others might have had the same idea as me, but much sooner.
Once I learned that they existed, I plucked up courage and asked Jan if he might consider doing me some copies. Thankfully he was a generous soul and agreed. And can you guess what the first story I requested was? Indeed. 'The Invasion'.
Picture the scene. I would set up my dad’s cassette decks in the back room of our house – luckily my dad had a pretty decent hi-fi set up, which was why I had been able to record Doctor Who directly from a TV tuner rather than via a microphone since the time I started recording it. I would then slip on a pair of headphones and settle back in the armchair, press ‘play’ and close my eyes. With a whoosh the TARDIS reformed in space and the Doctor, Jamie and Zoe were wondering where they were … it was the dark side of the moon, and someone had fired a missile at them!
What an experience that was. To actually listen to this particular Doctor Who story after all those years. But what really got to me was the music. That haunting Don Harper score transported me like nothing has before or since. Even today I cannot hear that music without being plunged into a reverie of goosebump-raising pleasure, full of images of the second Doctor, Jamie, Zoe and the Cybermen. I find it hard to believe that just four minutes of music – for that is all there is, it’s just repeated a lot – can have such a profound effect on a person.
I loved 'The Invasion'. Loved it with a passion. When I eventually managed to get my hands on a video copy of it some years later, my love affair with this single sixties adventure continued unabated. To actually watch it was, at the time, still a great novelty – something else which fans today forget. Not everyone used to simply be able to go to their cupboard and have the choice of numerous Doctor Who adventures before them. I can remember being pleased and surprised that Benton was there at the start of episode two, I was staggered as to how good Kevin Stoney was on screen – I already knew him from the audio, but being able to see the visuals was simply mind-blowing.
When I got to the scenes in the sewers … whoa … severe sixties flashback time. There was my memory, as I remembered it, there, in front of me, on the television screen … I can’t explain but it’s like a rush of adrenaline, a powering through of nostalgia and love and pleasure and awe all mixed together.
When I started my own series of detailed synopses for the DWAS’ reference Department, we started with season 7, but when we came to season 6 (there was no rhyme nor reason for the order, just what we felt like doing) I of course wrote the synopsis for 'The Invasion' myself. Something that I was particularly, and obscurely, proud of, was that I tried really hard with the pieces for episodes 1 and 4 which did not exist on video. As a result, in certain green-eyed quarters there were claims that I had somehow hoarded those episodes on video as there was no way that I could have got all that detail without having seen the episodes recently. I beg to differ. I did not even remember watching those episodes in the sixties, but with Jeremy’s original synopsis to guide my way, and having listened to the tapes on numerous occasions, I could hear the story, while my imagination supplied the visuals. I just wrote them down as best I could, while not trying to do anything that might be disproved in the future.
Today I still love 'The Invasion'. It is a classic sixties Doctor Who adventure in many respects, and the commercial video release brought it to the attention of many fans world-wide. However, for me it is still the audio that I love with a passion. I really enjoy listening to Doctor Who on audio, even stories which exist on video in their entirety, and 'The Invasion' is one of my favourites. I only have to hear the bars of Harper’s music to be transported again …
Excuse me … I have to go now. There’s an audio tape demanding to be played.
David J Howe
1998
Getting Interactive - The Doctor Who Phoneline
GETTING INTERACTIVE
It's not often that the opportunity comes along to get involved in something new and groundbreaking, something that has the potential to really take-off and become big, and which also involves your favourite television show.
It was late in 1995 that I received a telephone call from a company called Big Hand Productions, asking if I would like to come and meet with them to discuss ideas for a new telephone line service that they were developing, based on Doctor Who. After a few calls to check out their legitimacy (yes, the BBC had heard of them and yes, it was kosher as far as the BBC knew) I went along to see them.
The initial idea was to present a sort of Doctor Who chat line with some bells and whistles on, and, after some discussion, I developed an initial concept up into a working phone-line that was run as a sort of demo to show people what the basic idea was all about.
It was at this point that everything went quiet. In fact, what had happened, was that the BBC was exploring whether this was something that they might be able to run themselves, and so the licence has being held up while they checked. There were also various issues surrounding the phone line concept, in that there was a lot of baggage associated with the term, mainly centred around the more seedy 'chat lines' that seem very popular, and also around the potential cost of such a service - premium rate calls are not cheap.
Thus I heard nothing for about eight months, and assumed that the project had died a death, when, suddenly, I was contacted by a company called Tele Global Marketing, which had taken over the project from Big Hand Productions, and told that the BBC had finally given their go-ahead and the project was back on-line once more. What was more, the technology available to run and control the service had moved on substantially, and now the service could be bigger and better than before.
After numerous meetings, I finally started to get to grips with what we might be able to do. It was, frankly, incredible. There was nothing that could not be done. Thus, we were potentially able to develop a Doctor Who interactive environment, in which callers could talk to one another, as well as participate in adventure games of many different types, listen and participate in star interviews, obtain all the latest news and gossip, discuss the show and its many spin-offs, and explore the environment which we would create to house all the material in.
With such a wide scope, it took a little time for it all to sink in, and for the process of actually devising and developing such an environment.
TGM had decided to start the service off with an homage to the Jon Pertwee Doctor, as Jon had recently died, and they felt that his era was as good a place as any to begin. I was therefore initially asked to design a virtual UNIT Headquarters in which all the functions could be incorporated.
One of the great things about the service is that people who dial in have total freedom to go wherever they want, at any time, and do almost whatever they like. Thus, when using the service, you use the standard 9-key telephone pad as a joystick, with the '5' as the central pivot. Pressing '5' and then '2' will move you ahead; pressing '5' and then '4' will move you to the left, and so on. Therefore the first thing I had to do was design a 'real' house, with different rooms and floors, so that all the movement keys could be worked out in advance.
Each of the rooms had to have some sort of function, and contain different aspects of the service, so that in the canteen, for example, there is a menu onto which wants and swaps can be placed; there is a file room in which archive interviews can be accessed; and in the Doctor's lab, is, of course, the TARDIS.
Having worked out the layout of the house, and what functions each of the rooms would have, the next task was to script it. At every point in the service, where you are and what you can do must be scripted and read so that the visitor hears what is going on. We were pleased to get Nicholas Courtney to act as the guide voice as this familiar voice is well suited to being heard in UNIT HQ. Unfortunately we were unable to secure the rights to use the character of the Brigadier – the copyright owner asked for far too much money and was unwilling to negotiate – but Nicholas Courtney fitted the bill admirably.
The HQ has three floors and around 15 operational rooms so there was a lot to think about. In addition, there are several games and puzzles that can be played: there's a type of 'Battleships' game in which alien forces approaching the HQ must be picked off; and also a minefield to be negotiated. In addition, the TARDIS has been programmed with an adventure game (the idea is that a new adventure will come on line each month) in which the visitor is whisked off to a distant asteroid to battle the Medusoids.
All this had to be written and scripted, and the adventure game was especially tricky as there you have a number of choices about where to go and what to do, and each option had to be followed through. It's like one of those 'Make your own Adventure' books, only in a real environment.
All of the scripted segments also had to be augmented with sound effects, music and voices so that the overall effect is of actually being in that environment. One early way I had of describing the whole service was 'Pay Radio' and that analogy still holds. There are documentary areas, news areas, interview areas (there's an exclusive chat with the sixth Doctor, Colin Baker somewhere in the HQ) and much more, and all of this had to be devised and written.
On the news side, contact had to be made with all the major publishers and producers of Doctor Who merchandise, including Virgin Publishing, BBC Books, BBC Video and Marvel Comics, and newslines set up for each. We hope to include advance book extract readings, details of forthcoming releases, competitions … anything related to the world of Doctor Who can be included. In addition, any of the new merchandise can be directly ordered on-line as there is a facility to connect you with John Fitton Ltd, who will be running a mail-order facility for the phoneline visitors. In addition, there will be special offers available at reduced prices.
As perhaps you can imagine, the telephone line service is not small, and when I had finished, the initial script ran to nearly 70 pages. This was then recorded at the end of February, with Nicholas Courtney playing the main guide voice, a wonderful lady called Sibohan Glithero playing the voice of the TARDIS – well we had to give it a voice so that visitors could get to know the Doctor's ship – and radio actor and voice-over artiste Peter Dickson voicing the adventure game as well as several other parts. Other voices will be added in as the service expands: the second adventure game features the Master, as well as several new characters.
One of the most encouraging things about the service is that TGM are very concerned about the cost. Realising that a premium rate phone line would end up costing a great deal to those who use it, they have arranged for the actual telephone calls to be made to a single national rate number (currently 6p per minute) from which all the money goes to BT. The company's income will come from the sales of collectible 'access cards' which, for £10, will give you a predefined period of time on the service. The initial card will feature Jon Pertwee as the Doctor, and comes with an information booklet which summarises the key-commands to move around the service (as well as the movement keys, you can pick up and carry with you objects that you find in the HQ, which include weapons which can be fired at other visitors to temporarily throw them off the service). It also includes a unique Personal Identification Number which is used to identify you when you dial into the service. When your allotted time is up, you simply buy another card – maybe of a different design – and dial in again.
This telephone line service is the first of its kind anywhere in the world. Although a similar chatline service has been running for some time (called 'The Villa') the Doctor Who line has stretched the technology to the limit, with my pushing for features and interaction at every level, all combined with a healthy sense and feel of Doctor Who. For the future we hope to bring more Doctor Who stars into the HQ to talk and chat to visitors. Who would you like to see? What would you like to see covered? One of the important aspects of the service is that, on top of everything else, it is a chat-line. This means that you can discuss aspects of Who with anyone in the house, and if they're not there at the time, then you can leave messages for them in the private mail box that everyone is allocated. This gives Who fans everywhere the ability to contact and communicate directly with each other, and to create discussion and interest in whatever subjects they wish to bring up.
I'm very excited by the whole project. It's new and different, and combines the best of the Internet culture, with interactive computer games, and the advantage of being able to talk and discuss the subjects that are important at the time: should Doctor Who return? What will the BBC be doing with the range of books now that they have taken over the publication from Virgin? Should novels featuring the Doctor being covered in Chocolate Sauce be published? What videos should the BBC release next? Should they be 'tinkered' with to include previously missing and never-before seen material? It's a service for the fans to use, and, to succeed, it needs participants.
Why not give it a try. It's not expensive compared to the current price of videos and books, and you might just find it enjoyable.
David J Howe
1988
Of course nothing runs to plan, and after this piece was written, nothing happened ... I waited and waited and still nothing happened. Eventually I learned that the Doctor Who line had been cancelled, and worse still, because I was to be paid when it launched ... I would not be paid! So all the time and effort which had gone into it was for nothing. However, as I still have all the assets, here for the first time is the script for the adventure which hopefully gives an insight into something which could have been great in a pre-internet age, but which simply was not to be.
I have scripts for the UNIT environment, and for two further adventures accessed from a Time Portal in the basement (I think)! But for the moment, here's the scripts for the UNIT environment. Three floors, lots of rooms (and I have files with maps and notes and all sorts of things I used to develop it all. Looking back, I can't believe the amount of work this all was!
TARDIS - Female voice - used for scenes within the TARDIS
Voice B - ‘Juke Box’ (female) - an excuse for a different voice.
S
Where ‘S’ is the fixed start point and ‘F’ is the fixed
finish point. Three mines are automatically and randomly placed by the computer
on three of the grid points (excluding ‘S’ and ‘F’). Using the ‘check’ facility
(only available if the player has the sonic screwdriver) the position of the
mines can be determined.
Toilet - smutty and conspiratorial
Russell - Army man, obsessed with guns. Probably a train spotter as well.
It's not often that the opportunity comes along to get involved in something new and groundbreaking, something that has the potential to really take-off and become big, and which also involves your favourite television show.
It was late in 1995 that I received a telephone call from a company called Big Hand Productions, asking if I would like to come and meet with them to discuss ideas for a new telephone line service that they were developing, based on Doctor Who. After a few calls to check out their legitimacy (yes, the BBC had heard of them and yes, it was kosher as far as the BBC knew) I went along to see them.
The initial idea was to present a sort of Doctor Who chat line with some bells and whistles on, and, after some discussion, I developed an initial concept up into a working phone-line that was run as a sort of demo to show people what the basic idea was all about.
It was at this point that everything went quiet. In fact, what had happened, was that the BBC was exploring whether this was something that they might be able to run themselves, and so the licence has being held up while they checked. There were also various issues surrounding the phone line concept, in that there was a lot of baggage associated with the term, mainly centred around the more seedy 'chat lines' that seem very popular, and also around the potential cost of such a service - premium rate calls are not cheap.
Thus I heard nothing for about eight months, and assumed that the project had died a death, when, suddenly, I was contacted by a company called Tele Global Marketing, which had taken over the project from Big Hand Productions, and told that the BBC had finally given their go-ahead and the project was back on-line once more. What was more, the technology available to run and control the service had moved on substantially, and now the service could be bigger and better than before.
After numerous meetings, I finally started to get to grips with what we might be able to do. It was, frankly, incredible. There was nothing that could not be done. Thus, we were potentially able to develop a Doctor Who interactive environment, in which callers could talk to one another, as well as participate in adventure games of many different types, listen and participate in star interviews, obtain all the latest news and gossip, discuss the show and its many spin-offs, and explore the environment which we would create to house all the material in.
With such a wide scope, it took a little time for it all to sink in, and for the process of actually devising and developing such an environment.
TGM had decided to start the service off with an homage to the Jon Pertwee Doctor, as Jon had recently died, and they felt that his era was as good a place as any to begin. I was therefore initially asked to design a virtual UNIT Headquarters in which all the functions could be incorporated.
One of the great things about the service is that people who dial in have total freedom to go wherever they want, at any time, and do almost whatever they like. Thus, when using the service, you use the standard 9-key telephone pad as a joystick, with the '5' as the central pivot. Pressing '5' and then '2' will move you ahead; pressing '5' and then '4' will move you to the left, and so on. Therefore the first thing I had to do was design a 'real' house, with different rooms and floors, so that all the movement keys could be worked out in advance.
Each of the rooms had to have some sort of function, and contain different aspects of the service, so that in the canteen, for example, there is a menu onto which wants and swaps can be placed; there is a file room in which archive interviews can be accessed; and in the Doctor's lab, is, of course, the TARDIS.
Having worked out the layout of the house, and what functions each of the rooms would have, the next task was to script it. At every point in the service, where you are and what you can do must be scripted and read so that the visitor hears what is going on. We were pleased to get Nicholas Courtney to act as the guide voice as this familiar voice is well suited to being heard in UNIT HQ. Unfortunately we were unable to secure the rights to use the character of the Brigadier – the copyright owner asked for far too much money and was unwilling to negotiate – but Nicholas Courtney fitted the bill admirably.
The HQ has three floors and around 15 operational rooms so there was a lot to think about. In addition, there are several games and puzzles that can be played: there's a type of 'Battleships' game in which alien forces approaching the HQ must be picked off; and also a minefield to be negotiated. In addition, the TARDIS has been programmed with an adventure game (the idea is that a new adventure will come on line each month) in which the visitor is whisked off to a distant asteroid to battle the Medusoids.
All this had to be written and scripted, and the adventure game was especially tricky as there you have a number of choices about where to go and what to do, and each option had to be followed through. It's like one of those 'Make your own Adventure' books, only in a real environment.
All of the scripted segments also had to be augmented with sound effects, music and voices so that the overall effect is of actually being in that environment. One early way I had of describing the whole service was 'Pay Radio' and that analogy still holds. There are documentary areas, news areas, interview areas (there's an exclusive chat with the sixth Doctor, Colin Baker somewhere in the HQ) and much more, and all of this had to be devised and written.
On the news side, contact had to be made with all the major publishers and producers of Doctor Who merchandise, including Virgin Publishing, BBC Books, BBC Video and Marvel Comics, and newslines set up for each. We hope to include advance book extract readings, details of forthcoming releases, competitions … anything related to the world of Doctor Who can be included. In addition, any of the new merchandise can be directly ordered on-line as there is a facility to connect you with John Fitton Ltd, who will be running a mail-order facility for the phoneline visitors. In addition, there will be special offers available at reduced prices.
As perhaps you can imagine, the telephone line service is not small, and when I had finished, the initial script ran to nearly 70 pages. This was then recorded at the end of February, with Nicholas Courtney playing the main guide voice, a wonderful lady called Sibohan Glithero playing the voice of the TARDIS – well we had to give it a voice so that visitors could get to know the Doctor's ship – and radio actor and voice-over artiste Peter Dickson voicing the adventure game as well as several other parts. Other voices will be added in as the service expands: the second adventure game features the Master, as well as several new characters.
One of the most encouraging things about the service is that TGM are very concerned about the cost. Realising that a premium rate phone line would end up costing a great deal to those who use it, they have arranged for the actual telephone calls to be made to a single national rate number (currently 6p per minute) from which all the money goes to BT. The company's income will come from the sales of collectible 'access cards' which, for £10, will give you a predefined period of time on the service. The initial card will feature Jon Pertwee as the Doctor, and comes with an information booklet which summarises the key-commands to move around the service (as well as the movement keys, you can pick up and carry with you objects that you find in the HQ, which include weapons which can be fired at other visitors to temporarily throw them off the service). It also includes a unique Personal Identification Number which is used to identify you when you dial into the service. When your allotted time is up, you simply buy another card – maybe of a different design – and dial in again.
This telephone line service is the first of its kind anywhere in the world. Although a similar chatline service has been running for some time (called 'The Villa') the Doctor Who line has stretched the technology to the limit, with my pushing for features and interaction at every level, all combined with a healthy sense and feel of Doctor Who. For the future we hope to bring more Doctor Who stars into the HQ to talk and chat to visitors. Who would you like to see? What would you like to see covered? One of the important aspects of the service is that, on top of everything else, it is a chat-line. This means that you can discuss aspects of Who with anyone in the house, and if they're not there at the time, then you can leave messages for them in the private mail box that everyone is allocated. This gives Who fans everywhere the ability to contact and communicate directly with each other, and to create discussion and interest in whatever subjects they wish to bring up.
I'm very excited by the whole project. It's new and different, and combines the best of the Internet culture, with interactive computer games, and the advantage of being able to talk and discuss the subjects that are important at the time: should Doctor Who return? What will the BBC be doing with the range of books now that they have taken over the publication from Virgin? Should novels featuring the Doctor being covered in Chocolate Sauce be published? What videos should the BBC release next? Should they be 'tinkered' with to include previously missing and never-before seen material? It's a service for the fans to use, and, to succeed, it needs participants.
Why not give it a try. It's not expensive compared to the current price of videos and books, and you might just find it enjoyable.
David J Howe
1988
Of course nothing runs to plan, and after this piece was written, nothing happened ... I waited and waited and still nothing happened. Eventually I learned that the Doctor Who line had been cancelled, and worse still, because I was to be paid when it launched ... I would not be paid! So all the time and effort which had gone into it was for nothing. However, as I still have all the assets, here for the first time is the script for the adventure which hopefully gives an insight into something which could have been great in a pre-internet age, but which simply was not to be.
I have scripts for the UNIT environment, and for two further adventures accessed from a Time Portal in the basement (I think)! But for the moment, here's the scripts for the UNIT environment. Three floors, lots of rooms (and I have files with maps and notes and all sorts of things I used to develop it all. Looking back, I can't believe the amount of work this all was!
DOCTOR WHO TELEPHONE LINES
SCRIPT - UNIT ENVIRONMENT - GROUND FLOOR
VOICES:
Sergeant - used for descriptions
Voice A - ‘Control’ - used for ‘control’ information and
basic descriptionsTARDIS - Female voice - used for scenes within the TARDIS
Voice B - ‘Juke Box’ (female) - an excuse for a different voice.
MINEFIELD
The Minefield Map is as follows:
F|
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CODE
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SCRIPT
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NOTES
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MAIN INTRODUCTION
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<sfx TARDIS Cloister Bell - one ring. Track 56 on CD
> sorry, that’s not a valid selection
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VOICE A
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<sfx TARDIS Cloister Bell - one ring. Track 56 on CD
> sorry, an error has occurred, please try that later
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VOICE A
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You are now leaving UNIT HQ. See you soon.
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SERGEANT
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<Introduction Sequence Sound FX: TARDIS Landing (short)
over top of background music: DOCTOR WHO theme >
Welcome to the World of Doctor Who.
You are about to enter UNIT HQ, the base of operations for
the global organisation created to investigate and study all terrestrial -
and extra terrestrial - phenomena. Through UNIT’s resources you have full
access to knowledge, information and entertainment related to the BBC
Television programme Doctor Who.
You can move around the HQ by using the dial or buttons on
your phone. Any phone will work but it’s quicker if you’re using a tone
phone. If your telephone has buttons that you press, you may be able to
switch it to tone-dialling – often there’s a switch on the underneath, or
side, of your phone. You might want to try that now …
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VOICE A
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So we can test your phone press or dial the ‘one’ now …
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VOICE A
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We are sorry but the Duty Officer has advised us that the
HQ is full right now. Please try again later.
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VOICE A
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Sorry, but your telephone is not compatible with our
service. Here is a selection from the services that are available. Please try
again with a MF or tone-phone.
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VOICE A
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ENTRANCE
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You’re in the Entrance.
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VOICE A
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Hello there.
Pleased to meet you.
You’re at the entrance to UNIT HQ.
The United Nations Intelligence Taskforce. Bit of a
mouthful that, so we stick to UNIT.
SERGEANT Munro at your service. The Brigadier’s been
called away to Geneva, so I’ll be your guide during your stay at the HQ. If
you need to know anything about what goes on here – I’m your man.
There’s lots to do and see and, as well as yourself, we
have several other visitors, so please feel free to talk to anyone as you
wander round.
There’s a notice board ahead which has on it information
about how to move about the HQ as well as details of anything special that’s
coming up. If you need any further information, then the Brigadier’s office
is just to your left. The door’s always open, so just pop in anytime.
Sorry the carpet’s a little worn. Lack of government
finding, you know.
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SERGEANT
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Ahead is the Hall.
Ahead and to the Left is the Notice board
Left is the SERGEANT’s Office.
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VOICE A
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BRIGADIER’S OFFICE
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You are in the Brigadier’s Office
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VOICE A
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Ahead is a desk.
Right is the Entrance.
Behind is a drinks cabinet.
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VOICE A
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This is the Brigadier’s office, smaller than he’d hoped
for when we moved here, but beggars can’t be choosers.
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SERGEANT
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You’re standing by the Brig’s desk which is, as usual,
piled with paper. There’s a file here that might interest you: details of
who’s in the HQ at the moment.
To inspect the file, press ##
To get help on the system, press ##
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SERGEANT
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Cabinet’s locked, I’m afraid, and the key’s gone missing.
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SERGEANT
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NOTICE BOARD
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The Notice Board’s one of the few things left in this
place that the Doctor hasn’t tinkered with.
To listen to today’s messages, press ##
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SERGEANT
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To obtain information on the following subjects, press the
appropriate code number:
1 - Standard Function Keys
2 - Standard Movement Keys
3 - Talking
4 - Public Message Areas
5 - Objects
6 - Fast Keys To Specific Locations
7 - What’s On …
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VOICE A
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Standard Function Keys
Press ‘hash’ for help at any time
Press ‘star’ ‘four’ ‘hash’ to find out who is where in the
HQ
Press ‘six’ to find out who is in a room.
Press ‘five’ ‘five’ to stop a narrative in progress
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VOICE A
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Standard Movement Keys
You walk about by using your telephone keypad like a
compass. Press ‘five’ followed by the direction in which you wish to go.
For example, pressing ‘five’ ‘three’ will take you Ahead
and Right
Pressing ‘star’ ‘zero’ ‘hash’ takes you straight to the
Entrance
Pressing ‘star’ ‘hash’ takes you back one step
Pressing ‘star’ ‘eight’ ‘hash’ takes you straight to your
private desk.
You don’t have to wait for descriptions to finish before
moving on. If you know the combination of keys to press, you can key them
with no breaks to take you straight to where you want to go.
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VOICE A
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Talking
Press ‘four’ and speak after the tone, then ‘four’ again
when you have finished speaking. Everyone in the same room will hear you
after the second ‘four’.
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VOICE A
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Public Message Areas
All the public message areas (the toilet wall, the menu
board, the radio room etc) work in the same way:
‘one’ scrolls backwards
‘two’ play or replay
‘three’ scroll forwards
‘four’ leave a message yourself
‘six’ how many messages are there?
‘Eight’ send a private voicemail to the author of the
message
‘nine’ obtain date, time and author of the message
‘zero’ delete – only if the message is yours
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VOICE A
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Objects
Various objects are scattered around the HQ.
By pressing ‘nine’ you can find out what is in the room
with you.
As you hear an object named, press ‘hash’ to pick it up
You can press ‘seven’ to find out what you are carrying
and, when you hear an object named, you can press ‘eight’
to use it or ‘zero’ to throw it away
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VOICE A
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Fast Keys To Specific Locations
Pressing ‘star’ ‘zero’ ‘hash’ takes you straight to the
Entrance
Pressing ‘star’ ‘eight’ ‘hash’ takes you straight to your
private desk.
Pressing ## takes you straight to the TARDIS
|
VOICE A
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What’s On
Nicholas Courtney Interview dates
TO BE ADDED
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HALL
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You’re in the Hall.
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VOICE A
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Not terribly attractive, I’m afraid. Like all the halls in
this place, it’s got green and brown painted walls. There are doors along
either side, leading further into the HQ.
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SERGEANT
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Ahead is the Lift.
Left is the Doctor’s laboratory.
Right is the Lounge.
Ahead and to the Left is the Staff Canteen.
Ahead and to the Right is the Radio Room.
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VOICE A
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DOCTOR’S LAB
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You’re in the Doctor’s Lab
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VOICE A
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This room is typical of the Doctor – who, incidentally, is
off on one of his ‘jaunts’ at the moment. I have no idea what he gets up to
in here. Maybe you can make sense of it.
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SERGEANT
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Ahead is the TARDIS.
Behind is the Doctor’s bench.
Left is a spiral staircase. <To File Room>
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VOICE A
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You’re standing by the Doctor’s bench. On it is a,
frankly, bewildering array of glass retorts, tubes and beakers full of
coloured liquid, not to mention other assorted pieces of junk and clutter,
newspapers and books on subjects ranging from ancient history, to particle
physics.
The following objects can be carried:
a half-drunk cup of tea,
a pencil
a book
and
the Doctor’s Sonic Screwdriver
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SERGEANT
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You are carrying
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VOICE A
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and
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VOICE A
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<carrying> a pencil
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VOICE A
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<carrying> a book
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VOICE A
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<carrying> a half-drunk cup of tea
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VOICE A
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<carrying> the sonic screwdriver
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VOICE A
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The following list
of objects are ‘random’ and can be found randomly throughout UNIT HQ. Some
may be used in future game scenarios (both within the HQ or through the
TARDIS).
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<carrying> the Doctor’s ring
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VOICE A
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<carrying> a recorder
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VOICE A
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<carrying> the sonic screwdriver
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VOICE A
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<carrying> a bag of jelly babies
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VOICE A
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<carrying> a stick of wilted celery
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VOICE A
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<carrying> a badge shaped like a cat
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VOICE A
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<carrying> an umbrella with a question-mark handle
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VOICE A
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In front of you, on the floor, is the Doctor’s ring.
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VOICE A
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In front of you, on the floor, is a recorder.
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VOICE A
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In front of you, on the floor, is the sonic screwdriver.
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VOICE A
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In front of you, on the floor, is a bag of jelly babies.
|
VOICE A
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In front of you, on the floor, is a stick of wilted
celery.
|
VOICE A
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In front of you, on the floor, is a badge shaped like a
cat.
|
VOICE A
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In front of you, on the floor, is an umbrella with a
question-mark handle.
|
VOICE A
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TARDIS
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The Doctor’s TARDIS looks just like a blue London police
telephone box doesn’t it … Don’t say I didn’t warn you … <fade out voice
as enter TARDIS>
|
SERGEANT
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<Female Voice >
Welcome to TARDIS.
The Doctor has programmed me to speak in order to help
anyone who enters during his absence.
My name is derived from the initial letters Time And
Relative Dimension In Space, and I am Dimensionally Transcendental, which, in
Human terms, simply means that I am bigger on the inside than out.
The Doctor has left some journey programs active on the
console for you to try if you wish. Each destination can be travelled to, and
some may be dangerous. It might be wise to carry some equipment with you –
and maybe a weapon of some description with which to defend yourself should
you be attacked.
You will be given a teleport button to take with you for
fast return.
|
TARDIS
|
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<Female Voice>
You’re in the Doctor’s TARDIS.
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TARDIS
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<Female Voice>
Ahead is my Control Console
Left is the Scanner Screen.
Behind are the main doors.
Right is a closed door.
|
TARDIS
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<Female Voice>
The scanner screen is open and is currently displaying a
view of the Doctor’s lab in UNIT HQ. The following people are also in the Lab
…
<List of people>
|
TARDIS
|
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<Female Voice>
The door is locked and will not open.
|
TARDIS
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|
<Female Voice>
My Control Console is covered with a great many switches,
lights, buttons and levers. In the centre is a large, translucent column,
filled with lights and circuitry.
In front of you is the destination selector
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TARDIS
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|
<carrying>
the Teleport Button. Press ## at any time to return to the TARDIS.
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
<Female Voice>
The destinations currently programmed are as follows:
1 - The mines on the asteroid Zista Five.
To select the destination of your choice, press the
appropriate code now.
|
TARDIS
|
|
|
<Teleport button removed when the TARDIS is left>
|
TARDIS
|
|
|
CANTEEN
|
|
|
|
You’re in the Canteen
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
The Canteen’s basic NAAFI mess. They make a mean cup of
tea, but … I wouldn’t try anything too exotic. Chef’s got a bit of the gormet
in him in you ask me. Doctor loves it of course …
|
SERGEANT
|
|
|
Ahead is a dumb waiter.
Behind is the Menu Board.
Back and to the Right is the Hall.
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
This board is supposed to be for today’s menu, but people
will keep using it for their own messages. There’s messages about items
either wanted, or for swap. You can add your own messages if you wish, or
reply to some of those that are here.
Just … just don’t let the Chef see you …
|
SERGEANT
|
|
|
One of the Doctor’s inventions, the Dumb Waiter is
actually a private area where, if you wish, you can have a conversation with
one other person. There’s only room for two people here at a given time.
|
SERGEANT
|
|
|
Sorry, there are two people inside the Dumb Waiter
already. Why not try later.
|
SERGEANT
|
|
|
RADIO ROOM
|
|
|
|
You’re in the Radio Room
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
The Radio Room is where we gather intelligence from the
outside world. It’s fully automated, and the news file is updated on a
regular basis. We can also send outgoing messages to other UNIT HQ’s
worldwide, so if you’ve got anything that might be of interest … pass it on.
|
SERGEANT
|
|
|
LOUNGE
|
|
|
|
You’re in the Lounge
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
Rest and Relaxation. That’s what goes on in the Lounge.
Can’t have our people getting too stressed out, so they can pop in here to
listen to music, chat (there’s a comfy sofa that can be used by up to four
people for a private discussion) or even just gaze out the window … Those
roses need pruning, though.
|
SERGEANT
|
|
|
Ahead is a sofa.
Ahead and to the Right is a large window.
Right is a sophisticated Jukebox and Recording Studio.
Behind is a large, brick fireplace.
Behind and to the Right is the Visitor’s book.
Left is the Hall.
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
Sorry, there are four people already sitting on the Sofa.
Please try again later.
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
WINDOW/GARDEN/MINEFIELD
|
|
|
|
Watch out for that window … it’s loose … <FX>
|
SERGEANT
|
|
|
As you lean on the window, it suddenly swings open and you
are unexpectedly pitched out into the garden. The window swings closed behind
you and clicks shut.
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
You are in the Garden, standing in a bed of the SERGEANT’s
prize roses.
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
Ahead is the Lawn
Behind is the Window
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
You can’t go that way as the window has locked behind you.
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
Immediately ahead is a large, red sign, with a skull and
cross-bones painted on in white, together with the words ‘RANDOM MINE FIELD’.
Across a stretch of grass is a wooden post, hanging on
which you can see a shiny key, which looks as though it may open the window
through which you have fallen.
You need to get to the key, but go carefully. The grass is
mined. If you have the Doctor’s Sonic Screwdriver with you, you can check
before you move.
To check, press ## followed by the direction command.
To move, just press the direction command.
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
You are standing by the Window
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
To cross the Minefield, head or check either Left, Right
or Forward.
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
Head or check either Left, Right or Backwards
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
Head or check either Left, Right or Forwards
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
Head or check either Left, Right, Forwards or Backwards
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
Head or check either Right, Forwards or Backwards
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
Head or check either Right or Forwards
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
Head or check either Right or Backwards
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
Head or check either Left, Forwards or Backwards
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
Head or check either Left or Forwards
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
Head or check either Left or Backwards
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
That way is safe
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
There is a mine in that direction
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
You’ve reached the left hand side of the minefield
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
You’ve reached the right hand side of the minefield
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
You’re at the bottom edge of the minefield
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
You’re at the top edge of the minefield. The key is to
your Right
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
You’re at the top edge of the minefield. The key is to
your Left
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
Congratulations, you have reached the key. Now retrace
your steps to return to the Window.
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
Sorry, you have no means of checking the way. You’ll have
to take a chance.
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
You return to the window and find that the key fits. With
some effort, and with minimal damage to the SERGEANT’s roses, you manage to
scramble back into the Lounge.
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
FIREPLACE
|
|
|
|
You’re standing in the Fireplace.
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
To crawl up the chimney, press ##
To scramble down the chimney, press ##
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
It’s dark and sooty, but you are just able to find enough
foot holds in the gloom to move through the chimney.
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
Your hand makes contact with what in the darkness feels
like a box.
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
<carrying> a locked and grimy box which rattles when
shaken.
(This box is
intended for use in a future TARDIS game scenario. The keys will be available
within the game)
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
You reach another fireplace, but it is blocked and there
is no way through.
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
There is no way to go in that direction.
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
VISITOR’S BOOK
|
|
|
|
Ah yes, the
visitor’s book. All manner of folks connected with the Doctor drop by from
time to time, old friends, future friends, sometimes those alien … things …
leave notes for us. Wish they wouldn’t, though. Dashed embarrasing.
|
SERGEANT
|
|
|
To listen to any messages, press ##
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
JUKEBOX/RECORDING
STUDIO
|
|
|
|
That’s the latest, hi-tech digital recording studio and
jukebox. It was standard until the Doctor got hold of it. You can either
select a commercial track to listen to, listen through to other people’s
recordings, or leave a recording yourself.
|
SERGEANT
|
|
|
Hi there!
I’m a mark three Personal Entertainment System developed
by the Alpha entertainment system on Cantro. You can use me to leave audible
entertainment for others to enjoy, or select from my current selection.
Press ## to hear a list of available tracks
Press ## to listen to recordings left by other visitors
Press ## to make your own recording
|
VOICE B
|
|
|
I’m sorry, there aren’t any commercial tracks available at
present.
|
VOICE B
|
|
|
I’m sorry, there are no recordings available at present.
Perhaps you’d like to leave one.
|
VOICE B
|
|
|
I’m afraid it hasn’t worked since one of the Doctor’s
‘experiments’. Poor old Walker’s not been the same since.
|
SERGEANT
|
|
|
LIFT
|
|
|
|
You’re in the Lift on the ground floor.
Press ‘one’ ‘zero’ ‘hash’ to descend to the basement.
Press ‘one’ ‘two’ ‘hash’ to ascend to the first floor.
Behind is the Hall.
|
VOICE A
|
DOCTOR WHO TELEPHONE LINES
SCRIPT - UNIT ENVIRONMENT - BASEMENT
VOICES:
Sergeant - used for descriptions
Voice A - ‘Control’ - used for ‘control’ information and
basic descriptionsToilet - smutty and conspiratorial
Russell - Army man, obsessed with guns. Probably a train spotter as well.
|
CODE
|
SCRIPT
|
NOTES
|
|
|
LIFT
|
|
|
|
You’re in the Lift in the Basement.
Press ‘one’ ‘one’ ‘hash’ to ascend to the ground floor.
Press ‘one’ ‘two’ ‘hash’ to ascend to the first floor.
Ahead is the Lower Hall.
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
LOWER HALL (1)
|
|
|
|
You’re in the Lower Hall.
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
Ahead is the far end of the Hall.
Left is the Bathroom and Toilet.
Behind and to the Left is the Armoury.
Behind and to the Right is the Kitchen
Behind is the Lift
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
ARMOURY
|
|
|
|
You are in the Armoury
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
The Armoury is where we keep the weapons safely locked
away. Your access rating depends on the type of weapon we can issue you with.
The more time you’ve collectively spent in the HQ, the higher your rating.
The Advanced weapons will only be issued to the five highest rated visitors
to the HQ at a given time. Sergeant Russell is in charge here so please see
him if you want to borrow something.
|
SERGEANT
|
|
|
Your access rating is high at present, therefore you can,
if you wish, select a weapon from either of the two cabinets. The cabinets
are behind you, and to your left.
|
SERGEANT
|
|
|
Your access rating is low at present, therefore you can,
if you wish, select a weapon only from the cabinet behind you.
|
SERGEANT
|
|
|
Sorry, your access rating does not allow you to obtain an
advanced weapon at this time.
|
SERGEANT
|
|
|
This cabinet holds the basic weapons issued to UNIT
personnel. I must warn you that some
of these are unreliable and may occasionally backfire, sending you out of the
system, or may not work at all. Sergeant Russell will talk you though the
available weapons …
|
SERGEANT
|
|
|
Sir. <salute>
We’ve got the following basic weapons to choose from:
Revolver
Rifle
Stun grenade
|
RUSSELL
|
|
|
<carrying> a revolver
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
<carrying> a rifle
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
<carrying> a stun grenade
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
This cabinet holds the advanced weapons issued only to
higher rated UNIT personnel. Please be warned that some of these are
unreliable and may occasionally backfire, sending you out of the system, or
may not work at all. Sergeant Russell will talk you though the available
weapons …
|
SERGEANT
|
|
|
Sir. <salute>
In our exclusive range of Advanced weapons, we have:
Laser pistol
Bubble stun gun
Disintegrator gun
|
RUSSELL
|
|
|
<carrying> a laser pistol
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
<carrying> a bubble stun gun
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
<carrying> a disintegrator gun
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
One final thing. To fire your weapon, press ## at any time
|
RUSSELL
|
|
|
<fx for a revolver>
|
|
|
|
<fx for a rifle>
|
|
|
|
<fx for a stun grenade>
|
|
|
|
<fx for a laser pistol>
|
|
|
|
<fx for a bubble stun gun>
|
|
|
|
<fx for a disintegrator gun>
|
|
|
|
BATHROOM/TOILETS
|
|
|
|
You’re in the bathroom.
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
Yes … well … the Bathroom isn’t a place to hang around for
too long when there’s work to be done. Look at that graffiti. No sooner do we
clean it off, than more appears. I’ll go and get the janitor … <fades>
|
SERGEANT
|
|
|
Psst.
Psst.
Over here!
It’s the toilet here. Now that he’s gone, you can add some
graffiti of your own if you like. Go on – I like a bit of gossip!
Oh … and don’t mention to anyone that I can talk. Ok?
|
TOILET (conspiratorial)
|
|
|
LOWER HALL (2)
|
|
|
|
You’re at the far end of the Lower Hall
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
Ahead are steps leading to the cellar
Behind is the Hall leading to the Lift
Left is the Store Room
Ahead and Left are the Holding Cells
Ahead and Right is the Power Room
Right is the Black Museum
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
STORES
|
|
|
|
You’re in the Stores.
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
The Stores are where you can order up books, magazines,
toys and all manner of other items of merchandise related to the worlds of Doctor Who.
|
SERGEANT
|
|
|
To listen to an index of items currently available in the
Store Room, press ##
To order any item, press ## when instructed and you will
be connected either directly to the company concerned, or to an answer-phone
where ordering details can be left.
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
Right is the Lower Hall
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
CELLAR
|
|
|
|
At the bottom of a short flight of stairs is a stout,
wooden door. It’s securely locked. The Doctor’s been working on one of his
strange experiments down there and has advised us to keep it shut at all
times.
|
SERGEANT
|
|
|
HOLDING CELLS
|
|
|
|
The cells are undergoing renovation at the moment and
there’s no way in.
|
SERGEANT
|
|
|
POWER ROOM
|
|
|
|
You’re in the Power Room
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
The Power Room is where we get all the power from for the
HQ. It’s a small building, but we seem
to use a lot of energy, so the generator is quite powerful … it has to be,
really, as some of the Doctor’s experiments tend to make the lights dim.
|
SERGEANT
|
|
|
Behind is a switch
Ahead and to the Right is the Generator
Behind and to the Right is a door <to the Black
Museum>
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
That switch may not look like much, but it’s important. It
controls all the lights in the HQ. Switching it off means that everyone will
be thrown into darkness until the emergency generator can kick in. You can
switch it if you like by pressing ## … but don’t blame me for the results …
|
SERGEANT
|
|
|
<MESSAGE ISSUED TO ALL USERS ON THE SYSTEM>
Warning … Warning … All lights have been extinguished.
Please wait …
<FX of Generator powering up>
The lights are now back on.
Additional: One of
UNIT’s enemies has, under cover of darkness, stolen all objects currently
being carried by visitors to the HQ. You will have to relocate them if you
wish to continue carrying them.
|
TANNOY
|
|
|
The Generator is a large and cumbersome looking machine,
augmented with numerous computer panels and electronic read-outs.
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
At present, all entry ports are sealed, so there is no way
to affect the generator’s power consumption.
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
BLACK MUSEUM
|
|
|
|
You’re in the Black Museum
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
Ah yes. UNIT’s finest hours. Benton suggested putting this
little ‘Black Museum’ together after returning from some surveillance work up
at New Scotland Yard. It’s a history of UNIT … the battles … the enemies.
Stored here are artefacts from many of our campaigns and there are information
files accessible on each. Some of the items are out on loan at the moment,
and new finds are always being reported, so the selection will change from
time to time.
|
SERGEANT
|
|
|
Left is the Lower Hall
Ahead and Left is a door <to the Power Room>
Behind you is a large array of display cabinets
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
The display cabinets contain artefacts from UNIT’s many
missions. To hear a list of objects, press ##
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
The following objects are currently on display. To access
the attached information file, press ## when you hear the object.
1 -
2 -
3 -
4 -
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
KITCHEN
|
|
|
|
The kitchen is currently closed, I’m afraid. Chef’s not
happy, but that’s the way it is.
|
SERGEANT
|
DOCTOR WHO TELEPHONE LINES
SCRIPT - UNIT ENVIRONMENT - FIRST FLOOR
VOICES:
Sergeant - used for descriptions
Voice A - ‘Control’ - used for ‘control’ information and
basic descriptions
Hallett - Female Sergeant
Computer -
|
CODE
|
SCRIPT
|
NOTES
|
|
|
LIFT
|
|
|
|
You’re in the Lift on the First Floor.
Press ‘one’ ‘one’ ‘hash’ to descend to the ground floor.
Press ‘one’ ‘zero’ ‘hash’ to descend to the basement.
Ahead is the Upper Hall.
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
UPPER HALL (1)
|
|
|
|
You’re in the Upper Hall.
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
Ahead is the far end of the Hall.
Behind and to the Left is the Special Operations Room.
Behind and to the Right is the Mail Room
Left is the Meeting Room
Right is the Officer’s Changing Room
Behind is the Lift
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
SPECIAL OPERATIONS
|
|
|
|
You’re in the Special Operations Room
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
Ahead and Right is the Upper Hall.
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
Special Operations … this is where the creative people
really have fun. They’re following a story which twists and turns as more
facts are discovered. It’s certainly got me baffled. Sergeant Hallett is in
charge … I’ll hand you over to her.
|
SERGEANT
|
|
|
Sir. <Salutes>
In Special Operations we are following a story, the
instalments of which are provided by our visitors. You can take the story in
any direction you like and the only limits are those of your imagination.
Once an instalment has been recorded, it will be assessed
by the Special Operations team. The most effective scenario will be added to
the ongoing incident file.
To listen to the incident file containing up to the last
ten confirmed instalments of the story, press ‘two’ You can skip past entries
if you wish by pressing ‘three’
To add the next instalment yourself, press ‘four’
|
HALLETT
|
|
|
MEETING ROOM
|
|
|
|
Sorry, the Meeting Room’s currently out of action.
Termites … apparently.
|
SERGEANT
|
|
|
INTERROGATION ROOM
|
|
|
|
You’re in the Interrogation Room
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
Ahead is a door
Ahead and to the right is the Upper Hall
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
The Interrogation Room is where you can suggest your own
questions to be put to the stars of Doctor
Who.
Details of who is next due to come under the spotlight is
available by pressing ##.
To leave a question, press ‘four’ and speak clearly.
To listen to the most recent interrogation, press ‘two’.
You can skip to the next question by pressing ‘three’.
Past interrogations are available in the File Room.
|
SERGEANT
|
|
|
The next person to be interrogated is …
and the cut-off date for questions is …
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
TRACKING ROOM
|
|
|
|
You’re in the Tracking Room
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
Ahead is a fireplace
Left is the Tracking Console
Right is the Upper Hall
Behind is a door
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
UNIT is often the target for numerous invasion attempts by
assorted undesirables. By using the Console in the Tracking Room we can
locate enemy agents before they enter the HQ, and wipe them out via a range
of concealed weaponry hidden in the roof.
|
SERGEANT
|
|
|
<FX>
The Console is powering up.
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
There are no undesirables approaching UNIT HQ at this
time. Please try again later.
|
COMPUTER
|
|
|
<Random as to whether anyone’s approaching or not>
Alert! … Alert! … UNIT Telemetric tracking detects hostile
undesirables approaching.
|
COMPUTER
|
|
|
The Console shows a grid of four squares, by four squares,
numbered one to four horizontally and vertically. There are six alien life
forms converging on the HQ. By entering coordinates (horizontal first, then
vertical) from your telephone keypad, you can aim the weaponry to vapourise
anything at the given coordinates.
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
Press coordinates now.
|
COMPUTER
|
|
|
You have
|
COMPUTER
|
|
|
shots left
|
COMPUTER
|
|
|
ten
|
COMPUTER
|
|
|
nine
|
COMPUTER
|
|
|
eight
|
COMPUTER
|
|
|
seven
|
COMPUTER
|
|
|
six
|
COMPUTER
|
|
|
five
|
COMPUTER
|
|
|
four
|
COMPUTER
|
|
|
three
|
COMPUTER
|
|
|
two
|
COMPUTER
|
|
|
one shot left
|
COMPUTER
|
|
|
Congratulations. A direct hit. <FX>
|
COMPUTER
|
|
|
There are now
|
COMPUTER
|
|
|
life forms remaining.
|
COMPUTER
|
|
|
There is now one life form remaining.
|
COMPUTER
|
|
|
Bad luck, you missed.
|
COMPUTER
|
|
|
Well done. All life forms have been wiped out and the HQ
is safe.
|
COMPUTER
|
|
|
You have failed to eliminate all advancing life forms.
UNIT HQ must now prepare for invasion.
|
COMPUTER
|
|
|
UPPER HALL (2)
|
|
|
|
You’re in the Upper Hall
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
Ahead is the Balcony
Right is the Tracking Room
Behind and Right is the Interrogation Room
Left is the Library
Behind and Left is the File Room
Behind is the Upper Hall leading to the Lift
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
BALCONY
|
|
|
|
<Birdsong etc>
You’re on the Balcony.
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
Aahh … peace and quiet. I often come out here onto the
Balcony just to listen to the birds and to get away from it all. You can see
the Brig’s roses from here … and the driveway.
|
SERGEANT
|
|
|
Behind is the Upper Hall
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
<creaks and groans>
<crash of masonry>
<The balcony has collapsed - happens if visitor stays
there for over 20 seconds>
|
|
|
|
Are you alright? Seems the thing gave way under us. Shoddy
workmanship. I’ll get the chippy onto it right away <fade>
<NEXT IS THE ENTRANCE >
|
SERGEANT
|
|
|
LIBRARY
|
|
|
|
You’re in the Library
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
Left is the Upper Hall
Ahead are the bookshelves
Behind is a door
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
The Library’s where access to those people involved with
the production of Doctor Who
related items can be found.
We have several bookshelves, each of which is devoted to a
single organisation or publisher involved in the world of Doctor Who. The content of the shelves
is dictated by that organisation and almost anything may be found here, from
interviews and readings, to news and information about forthcoming products.
|
SERGEANT
|
|
|
The following shelves are available
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
<List to be Decided>
Marvel Comics
BBC Books
Virgin Publishing
Reeltime Pictures
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
FILE ROOM
|
|
|
|
You’re in the File Room
|
VOICE A
|
|
|
Ahead is a door
Right is a spiral staircase leading down <to Doctor’s
Lab>
Ahead and Left is the Upper Hall
Behind are the filing cabinets
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VOICE A
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Over the years UNIT has amassed a great many interviews
and other items of interest, all of which are stored here in the File Room.
From here you can listen to archive material both especially recorded for the
HQ, or supplied from other sources.
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SERGEANT
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To listen to an index of the material currently available,
press ##
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VOICE A
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The following files are currently available for access
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VOICE A
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<Files to be decided>
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VOICE A
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CHANGING ROOM
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The Changing Room is currently out of service.
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SERGEANT
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MAIL ROOM
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You’re in the Mail Room
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VOICE A
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Behind is your Private Desk
Ahead and Left is the Upper Hall
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VOICE A
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The Mail Room is where you can check whether any messages
have been left for you at your own Desk.
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SERGEANT
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